Moonlight

For most, sleep comes naturally when the sun sets and the moon rises. Yes, even when there is a New Moon, or the moon phase that reflects no light, majority of the world sleeps. I, on the other hand, don't always have that privilege.

My favorite form of a moon. Maybe I'm biased because it's my sorority's symbol?

For example, I worked the dreaded graveyard shift last night. I have a love/hate relationship with my career. I love that I have a career and receive a paycheck. That's always nice and I'm sure my husband appreciates it as well. I love helping people (even more so when they are grateful and appreciative and not yelling or ordering me around like I'm a waitress. I quit that job for a reason, dear patient). I love having a teamwork environment. My night shift coworkers are nothing short of amazing (well, most of the time, the job is stressful) and are very supportive when I need assistance or begin second guessing myself. Things are generally "slower" from time to time, which allows for more teamwork building exercises, aka helping me do tasks I have never completed before. I hate the fact that my family and friends are all at home, tucked into bed dreaming away, while I am forced to drink ungodly amounts of caffeine to stay awake and work. I hate that I have a hard time sleeping during the the day hours when the light is so bright, even the black garbage bags taped to my windows is not enough to prevent all forms of daylight in, hence hindering my ability to sleep. (Totally sounds classy, I know.) I hate that I sometimes miss out on fun activities because I'm either at work or sleeping. And man, I require a lot of sleep!

I should invest in one of these. Not sure it would matter though.

I am, however, extremely grateful for my daytime cuddle buddy. Today, for example, he kept me warm and did not disturb me. He is mighty cute. All women should be jealous.

He is always excited to see me when I get home and always willing to take naps with me. I am one lucky girl.  

Come on, you know you just want to say "awwwe!"

Not only am I grateful for him, I am grateful that Fall has arrived. And that Winter is coming. Why, might you ask, since Summer is my favorite season? Because it is darker, cloudier, and colder outside and I don't feel like I'm missing out on life. Sad, I know, but hey, whatever works to get some good sleep in. 

On the other hand, I am not grateful for Fall. (A new love/hate relationship.) Fall and CD must have a pact. A pact to make me miserable and dread the changing of the leaves and need to pull out my fall coat. Every October/November CD starts misbehaving. I'm not sure if it's CD's way of reminding me that it exists, especially when I have gone almost 12 months without any major complications. Yeah, you can say I've been in remission. You can say the medications are working. Or you can say that CD and TJ decided last year it was time for me to have a break.

Well, that was until Fall arrived.

Now, I know I should partially blame this midnight job. My body can't keep up with my switching schedules. Being an RN is great because you only have to work a couple 12 hour shifts a week. However, when it's midnights, and you have to switch your sleeping schedule multiple times throughout a given week, it becomes confused. So, not only am I tired all the time, but I have bad heartburn and CD is back with a vengeance. Luckily for me, I was able to complete my 12 hour shift saving lives, walk down the hall to the clinic, and get poked with an IV for my medicine. Today was Remicade day!

I am usually not a huge fan of this day. I've been on this medication for the last 10 years, and although it helps tremendously, it's not always convenient. I sit in a chair for 3+ hours with an IV infusing, not able to do much. And the drug makes me sleepy. So I am now trying to kill 2 birds with 1 stone (who came up with that phrase, it isn't very nice) by arranging them on days after I work. I can sleep while I'm getting the drug and save on some gas. Win-win, right? Right.

Now I just cross my fingers that it kicks in overnight (because I get to sleep during normal people hours tonight) so I can tackle that to-do list I had the other day.  Oh, and eat normal food again. :-)

Hello salad! I miss you and now crave you...

Until then, I'm going to enjoy the next 7 nights off and enjoy them as a normal (non-midnight working) person and go to bed at a reasonable hour and accomplish more during the day. That was a lot of "ands." Oh, and savor the moonlight from home. :-)