I was in bed yesterday, about to fall asleep and end the busy weekend when it hit me. I can't believe I forgot about it. One of the biggest, life changing days of my life, and I just forgot about it.
I'm not alone though. My family, husband, and friends (although, why would they have that date memorized?) forgot too.
Yesterday marked my 5 year anniversary. 5 YEARS!
What anniversary, you ask? The anniversary of the day that my life and body changed forever. The day that I woke up from a sigmoidoscopy and knew something wasn't right. The feeling of impending doom overtook me and I told my mom, "something isn't right, get the doctor." The nurses told me it was just gas and everything will be ok. I told them to get the doctor to me or I will start screaming.... that is how serious I was and how I knew something was wrong. I don't go throwing fits in hospitals, I was an adult.
Needless to say, I was right. I needed emergency surgery or I would die.
5 years ago yesterday was the day that I "woke up with" a colostomy and my life changed forever. I spent MONTHS in the hospital recuperating because I was septic. I had tubes down my nose into my stomach, tubes in my throat, oxygen, multiple IVs, the works. 5 years ago, I celebrated Christmas in the hospital. And while I cannot remember anything from the time the doctor told me I needed surgery until Christmas Eve, I will never forget anything that I experienced.
Generally, on December 18th, I take some time to reflect, have a small pity party, be thankful I'm still alive and realize that I am lucky to be where I am today. My parents were troopers for staying with me around the clock and I appreciate all that they had done for me during that time. My now husband and I had just started dating and he was even there for me every day after work.
Yet, this weekend was so busy with my sister's graduation, family being in town and errands that my very important anniversary (to me anyway) had been forgotten until 11:50pm last night. It makes me sad that I was unable to really reflect upon that day. It was a huge day in the history books for me and I like to acknowledge it. However, if I completely forgot about it all, then maybe my day was a good one? Either way, it has come and gone and I now sit here blogging about it.
I know there are other more important days to "celebrate" or have anniversaries over. But hey, if you didn't live it, you just don't know. And even though I no longer have this colostomy, (I now have a permanent ileostomy) I still think of December 18th as a day to remember. I experienced challenges and overcame them.
I usually don't pray all that often. I believe God has it out for me and I can't catch a break health wise. It's been almost 12 years since I've gone a whole year without complications. However, on December 18th, I generally pray and say thanks to Him for keeping me on this planet.
I am a good person, and while I don't agree with everything I've had to deal with, I am very thankful to be here to experience what life has to offer.
Monday, December 19, 2011
Friday, December 16, 2011
The Chaos of the Holidays
Why is it that this time of year is pure chaos?
The roads are busier, the malls are busier, my calendar is busier. When do I get a break or a day for me?
That doesn't look like it's coming for a while now. I am finally starting to get excited for Christmas, yet have so much to do! My list is not getting smaller, it is actually growing each day. There is one week left until Christmas Eve and I do not have my shopping finished.
Start stressing now!
I did, however, make time to have lunch with friends, see a broadway play in Detroit and spend an afternoon running errands with my husband. It all made up for the really bad start to my week.
I have never eaten at Fishbone's before. It was really good! The food was great, the wine sweet and the prices decent. My sister and I fully enjoyed our meals.
We then headed over to the Detroit Opera House and enjoyed our show from the balcony. I will never think of the Wizard of Oz in the same way again.
And now, I need to head to bed. My little sister graduates from college tomorrow morning and I have to be up early to watch it. Yes, I will be sleep deprived and probably crabby in the morning. However, I will definitely be a proud big sister when I hear her name called and she has that one moment when she realizes that the whole world is waiting for her as she walks across that stage!
Do you feel the holiday chaos, or is it just me?!
The roads are busier, the malls are busier, my calendar is busier. When do I get a break or a day for me?
That doesn't look like it's coming for a while now. I am finally starting to get excited for Christmas, yet have so much to do! My list is not getting smaller, it is actually growing each day. There is one week left until Christmas Eve and I do not have my shopping finished.
Start stressing now!
I did, however, make time to have lunch with friends, see a broadway play in Detroit and spend an afternoon running errands with my husband. It all made up for the really bad start to my week.
 |
| Dinner in Detroit |
I have never eaten at Fishbone's before. It was really good! The food was great, the wine sweet and the prices decent. My sister and I fully enjoyed our meals.
We then headed over to the Detroit Opera House and enjoyed our show from the balcony. I will never think of the Wizard of Oz in the same way again.
 |
| What a Wickedly Awesome show! |
And now, I need to head to bed. My little sister graduates from college tomorrow morning and I have to be up early to watch it. Yes, I will be sleep deprived and probably crabby in the morning. However, I will definitely be a proud big sister when I hear her name called and she has that one moment when she realizes that the whole world is waiting for her as she walks across that stage!
Do you feel the holiday chaos, or is it just me?!
Friday, December 9, 2011
Awareness
How has December been for you, so far?
I has been quite exciting for me! Senate passed Resolution 199, making December 1-7 Crohn's and Colitis Awareness week! This is big news. Really, BIG! The fact that we are making it to the Senate and White House to help out the 1.4 million people suffering from this "embarrassing" ailment feel more comfortable speaking out and seeking treatment is definitely something to shout from the rooftops. We are hoping that this will accelerate proper diagnosis and treatment to those who have been misdiagnosed for years or have been ignoring their symptoms!
While I know I raise Awareness everyday and am not embarrassed to talk to others about my issues, other people may not feel the same way. I've been lucky enough to have an amazing support group throughout the years. My family, friends, and friends I've made through CCFA support groups have all been there with me through the highs and lows of my disease. In my family, we can talk about anything at the dinner table, including, but not limited to, bowels. Why be embarrassed? Didn't we all read the book, "Everyone Poops?"
Facebook groups were blowing up their Awareness for IBD. And I was loving every second of it!
Even magazines like Cosmo was trying to raise awareness.
Although, they did not hit the mark when it comes to ostomies. This story actually caused me to write an email to Cosmo telling them I am ashamed of the article and the woman trying to tell her story did not sound educated. (She has her Psy.D and is a therapist.) She made it seem like having an ostomy was the worst thing to happen to her in her entire life. While I may have felt that way at one point too, it saved my life and I am eternally grateful for it.
Read it here.
Yes, not everyone will love their ostomy. I know I hate mine. But I don't have the option to reverse mine. She describes her ostomy as a "poopbag" and after reversal "when I woke up from the last surgery and wasn't attached to the bag, it was the best feeling in the world."
Everyone who has to deal with issues like this deserves their own opinion and the right to share their story. However, as a therapist, you would think she would want to help remove the stigma ostomies have attached to them, as she had to live with one for awhile. She cheapened and degraded the ostomy community. For many, ostomies are as important to saving lives as pacemakers, blood transfusions and organ transplants. If everyone were to talk about their ostomy experience in such negative light, I'm fearful many people out there would choose to die rather than deal with it. The object of raising awareness is not to make people fearful, but to voice the support there is out there. I'm sorry Cosmo, but that story received a big thumbs down from the social network of supporters out there.
In brighter light, I follow this motivational blogger who lives in NYC. Her name is Ali and she also has Crohn's disease. Ali loves to run and is always trying to raise awareness of IBD. In fact, she has sold tshirts to help do so (and run in races for Team Challenge, part of CCFA's half marathon training program). While her shirts have been sold out for awhile now, they are available again! I am excited to say I am going to buy one. Check them out and place an order yourself if you are interested!
I am hoping to one day be a part of Team Challenge. Part of that is raising money to help find a cure. Maybe I can come up with some awesome tshirt design and have you all support me and raise awareness too. Stay tuned!
Please educate people on IBD. Let's not have Awareness just be one week long, but all year long!
I has been quite exciting for me! Senate passed Resolution 199, making December 1-7 Crohn's and Colitis Awareness week! This is big news. Really, BIG! The fact that we are making it to the Senate and White House to help out the 1.4 million people suffering from this "embarrassing" ailment feel more comfortable speaking out and seeking treatment is definitely something to shout from the rooftops. We are hoping that this will accelerate proper diagnosis and treatment to those who have been misdiagnosed for years or have been ignoring their symptoms!
 |
| I proudly flashed this all over Facebook. |
While I know I raise Awareness everyday and am not embarrassed to talk to others about my issues, other people may not feel the same way. I've been lucky enough to have an amazing support group throughout the years. My family, friends, and friends I've made through CCFA support groups have all been there with me through the highs and lows of my disease. In my family, we can talk about anything at the dinner table, including, but not limited to, bowels. Why be embarrassed? Didn't we all read the book, "Everyone Poops?"
 |
| We all do it. Don't try to say you don't! |
Facebook groups were blowing up their Awareness for IBD. And I was loving every second of it!
 |
| I felt that way once.... but now, I know I can fight it! |
Even magazines like Cosmo was trying to raise awareness.
Although, they did not hit the mark when it comes to ostomies. This story actually caused me to write an email to Cosmo telling them I am ashamed of the article and the woman trying to tell her story did not sound educated. (She has her Psy.D and is a therapist.) She made it seem like having an ostomy was the worst thing to happen to her in her entire life. While I may have felt that way at one point too, it saved my life and I am eternally grateful for it.
Read it here.
Yes, not everyone will love their ostomy. I know I hate mine. But I don't have the option to reverse mine. She describes her ostomy as a "poopbag" and after reversal "when I woke up from the last surgery and wasn't attached to the bag, it was the best feeling in the world."
Everyone who has to deal with issues like this deserves their own opinion and the right to share their story. However, as a therapist, you would think she would want to help remove the stigma ostomies have attached to them, as she had to live with one for awhile. She cheapened and degraded the ostomy community. For many, ostomies are as important to saving lives as pacemakers, blood transfusions and organ transplants. If everyone were to talk about their ostomy experience in such negative light, I'm fearful many people out there would choose to die rather than deal with it. The object of raising awareness is not to make people fearful, but to voice the support there is out there. I'm sorry Cosmo, but that story received a big thumbs down from the social network of supporters out there.
In brighter light, I follow this motivational blogger who lives in NYC. Her name is Ali and she also has Crohn's disease. Ali loves to run and is always trying to raise awareness of IBD. In fact, she has sold tshirts to help do so (and run in races for Team Challenge, part of CCFA's half marathon training program). While her shirts have been sold out for awhile now, they are available again! I am excited to say I am going to buy one. Check them out and place an order yourself if you are interested!
I am hoping to one day be a part of Team Challenge. Part of that is raising money to help find a cure. Maybe I can come up with some awesome tshirt design and have you all support me and raise awareness too. Stay tuned!
Please educate people on IBD. Let's not have Awareness just be one week long, but all year long!
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Baby, It's Cold Outside!
Yesterday was the first snowfall of the year that stuck. Then it melted away today.
I hate admitting it, but waking up to snow on the trees was actually a really pretty sight. However, I was ecstatic it was not on the roads. For some reason, every winter, the lovely people of Michigan forget how to drive in the snow. I really don't understand why. It snows here 4-5 months of the year, EVERY YEAR. Oh well, I better get used to waking up earlier over the next 4 months. Or reteaching Michiganders how to drive. Not sure I have the time or the patience for the second one.
I finally pulled out my winter coat. And hat. And scarf/gloves/Ugg boots. I am also wearing leg warmers and a sweatshirt. Why? Because baby, it's cold outside!
I will be the first to admit I hate being cold and I hate the winter. It's cold and windy out. Not to mention I happen to be cold inside, too. The sun goes into hiding (although that is a plus for my sleeping habits!) and motivation levels tend to drop. Apparently my puppy is even feeling the winter's affects already. He has been sleeping more over the last few weeks. Not sure if he's sick or just feeling blah due to the gloomy weather.
And while I am not a fan of being cold, in the month of December I don't mind it AS MUCH. Why might you ask? Because it is my favorite time of year! Christmas is coming!!!
I love the holidays. I love spending time with my family and decorating and buying presents... and of course getting them, but the wrapping/giving/seeing facial reactions to said gifts are better. I love the Christmas lights and holiday music! Everything about this time of year is great!
And thanks to my new found love of Pinterest, I have been buying supplies to make some wonderful Christmas gifts this year. Now is as good of time as any to get crafty! I think my husband is freaking out about the money I'm spending, but he's super happy I've found a new hobby. I'll let you know how it all goes.
Until then, bundle up and stay warm, because baby, it's cold outside!
I hate admitting it, but waking up to snow on the trees was actually a really pretty sight. However, I was ecstatic it was not on the roads. For some reason, every winter, the lovely people of Michigan forget how to drive in the snow. I really don't understand why. It snows here 4-5 months of the year, EVERY YEAR. Oh well, I better get used to waking up earlier over the next 4 months. Or reteaching Michiganders how to drive. Not sure I have the time or the patience for the second one.
I finally pulled out my winter coat. And hat. And scarf/gloves/Ugg boots. I am also wearing leg warmers and a sweatshirt. Why? Because baby, it's cold outside!
I will be the first to admit I hate being cold and I hate the winter. It's cold and windy out. Not to mention I happen to be cold inside, too. The sun goes into hiding (although that is a plus for my sleeping habits!) and motivation levels tend to drop. Apparently my puppy is even feeling the winter's affects already. He has been sleeping more over the last few weeks. Not sure if he's sick or just feeling blah due to the gloomy weather.
 |
| Sleepy puppy! |
I love the holidays. I love spending time with my family and decorating and buying presents... and of course getting them, but the wrapping/giving/seeing facial reactions to said gifts are better. I love the Christmas lights and holiday music! Everything about this time of year is great!
 |
| The Christmas lights are so pretty at night! |
And thanks to my new found love of Pinterest, I have been buying supplies to make some wonderful Christmas gifts this year. Now is as good of time as any to get crafty! I think my husband is freaking out about the money I'm spending, but he's super happy I've found a new hobby. I'll let you know how it all goes.
Until then, bundle up and stay warm, because baby, it's cold outside!
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