Anniversary

I was in bed yesterday, about to fall asleep and end the busy weekend when it hit me. I can't believe I forgot about it. One of the biggest, life changing days of my life, and I just forgot about it.

I'm not alone though. My family, husband, and friends (although, why would they have that date memorized?) forgot too.

Yesterday marked my 5 year anniversary. 5 YEARS!

What anniversary, you ask? The anniversary of the day that my life and body changed forever. The day that I woke up from a sigmoidoscopy and knew something wasn't right. The feeling of impending doom overtook me and I told my mom, "something isn't right, get the doctor." The nurses told me it was just gas and everything will be ok. I told them to get the doctor to me or I will start screaming.... that is how serious I was and how I knew something was wrong. I don't go throwing fits in hospitals, I was an adult.

Needless to say, I was right. I needed emergency surgery or I would die.

5 years ago yesterday was the day that I "woke up with" a colostomy and my life changed forever. I spent MONTHS in the hospital recuperating because I was septic. I had tubes down my nose into my stomach, tubes in my throat, oxygen, multiple IVs, the works. 5 years ago, I celebrated Christmas in the hospital. And while I cannot remember anything from the time the doctor told me I needed surgery until Christmas Eve, I will never forget anything that I experienced.

Generally, on December 18th, I take some time to reflect, have a small pity party, be thankful I'm still alive and realize that I am lucky to be where I am today. My parents were troopers for staying with me around the clock and I appreciate all that they had done for me during that time. My now husband and I had just started dating and he was even there for me every day after work.

Yet, this weekend was so busy with my sister's graduation, family being in town and errands that my very important anniversary (to me anyway) had been forgotten until 11:50pm last night. It makes me sad that I was unable to really reflect upon that day. It was a huge day in the history books for me and I like to acknowledge it. However, if I completely forgot about it all, then maybe my day was a good one? Either way, it has come and gone and I now sit here blogging about it.

I know there are other more important days to "celebrate" or have anniversaries over. But hey, if you didn't live it, you just don't know. And even though I no longer have this colostomy, (I now have a permanent ileostomy) I still think of December 18th as a day to remember. I experienced challenges and overcame them.

I usually don't pray all that often. I believe God has it out for me and I can't catch a break health wise. It's been almost 12 years since I've gone a whole year without complications. However, on December 18th, I generally pray and say thanks to Him for keeping me on this planet.

I am a good person, and while I don't agree with everything I've had to deal with, I am very thankful to be here to experience what life has to offer.

The Chaos of the Holidays

Why is it that this time of year is pure chaos?

The roads are busier, the malls are busier, my calendar is busier. When do I get a break or a day for me?

That doesn't look like it's coming for a while now. I am finally starting to get excited for Christmas, yet have so much to do! My list is not getting smaller, it is actually growing each day. There is one week left until Christmas Eve and I do not have my shopping finished.

Start stressing now!

I did, however, make time to have lunch with friends, see a broadway play in Detroit and spend an afternoon running errands with my husband. It all made up for the really bad start to my week.

Dinner in Detroit

I have never eaten at Fishbone's before. It was really good! The food was great, the wine sweet and the prices decent. My sister and I fully enjoyed our meals.


We then headed over to the Detroit Opera House and enjoyed our show from the balcony. I will never think of the Wizard of Oz in the same way again.

What a Wickedly Awesome show!

And now, I need to head to bed. My little sister graduates from college tomorrow morning and I have to be up early to watch it. Yes, I will be sleep deprived and probably crabby in the morning. However, I will definitely be a proud big sister when I hear her name called and she has that one moment when she realizes that the whole world is waiting for her as she walks across that stage!

Do you feel the holiday chaos, or is it just me?!

Awareness

How has December been for you, so far?

I has been quite exciting for me! Senate passed Resolution 199, making December 1-7 Crohn's and Colitis Awareness week! This is big news. Really, BIG! The fact that we are making it to the Senate and White House to help out the 1.4 million people suffering from this "embarrassing" ailment feel more comfortable speaking out and seeking treatment is definitely something to shout from the rooftops. We are hoping that this will accelerate proper diagnosis and treatment to those who have been misdiagnosed for years or have been ignoring their symptoms!

I proudly flashed this all over Facebook.

While I know I raise Awareness everyday and am not embarrassed to talk to others about my issues, other people may not feel the same way. I've been lucky enough to have an amazing support group throughout the years. My family, friends, and friends I've made through CCFA support groups have all been there with me through the highs and lows of my disease. In my family, we can talk about anything at the dinner table, including, but not limited to, bowels. Why be embarrassed? Didn't we all read the book, "Everyone Poops?"

We all do it. Don't try to say you don't!

Facebook groups were blowing up their Awareness for IBD. And I was loving every second of it!

I felt that way once.... but now, I know I can fight it!

Even magazines like Cosmo was trying to raise awareness.

Although, they did not hit the mark when it comes to ostomies. This story actually caused me to write an email to Cosmo telling them I am ashamed of the article and the woman trying to tell her story did not sound educated. (She has her Psy.D and is a therapist.) She made it seem like having an ostomy was the worst thing to happen to her in her entire life. While I may have felt that way at one point too, it saved my life and I am eternally grateful for it.

Read it here.

Yes, not everyone will love their ostomy. I know I hate mine. But I don't have the option to reverse mine. She describes her ostomy as a "poopbag" and after reversal "when I woke up from the last surgery and wasn't attached to the bag, it was the best feeling in the world."


Everyone who has to deal with issues like this deserves their own opinion and the right to share their story. However, as a therapist, you would think she would want to help remove the stigma ostomies have attached to them, as she had to live with one for awhile. She cheapened and degraded the ostomy community. For many, ostomies are as important to saving lives as pacemakers, blood transfusions and organ transplants. If everyone were to talk about their ostomy experience in such negative light, I'm fearful many people out there would choose to die rather than deal with it. The object of raising awareness is not to make people fearful, but to voice the support there is out there. I'm sorry Cosmo, but that story received a big thumbs down from the social network of supporters out there.

In brighter light, I follow this motivational blogger who lives in NYC. Her name is Ali and she also has Crohn's disease. Ali loves to run and is always trying to raise awareness of IBD. In fact, she has sold tshirts to help do so (and run in races for Team Challenge, part of CCFA's half marathon training program). While her shirts have been sold out for awhile now, they are available again! I am excited to say I am going to buy one. Check them out and place an order yourself if you are interested!

I am hoping to one day be a part of Team Challenge. Part of that is raising money to help find a cure. Maybe I can come up with some awesome tshirt design and have you all support me and raise awareness too. Stay tuned!


Please educate people on IBD. Let's not have Awareness just be one week long, but all year long!

Baby, It's Cold Outside!

Yesterday was the first snowfall of the year that stuck. Then it melted away today.

I hate admitting it, but waking up to snow on the trees was actually a really pretty sight. However, I was ecstatic it was not on the roads. For some reason, every winter, the lovely people of Michigan forget how to drive in the snow. I really don't understand why. It snows here 4-5 months of the year, EVERY YEAR. Oh well, I better get used to waking up earlier over the next 4 months. Or reteaching Michiganders how to drive. Not sure I have the time or the patience for the second one.

I finally pulled out my winter coat. And hat. And scarf/gloves/Ugg boots. I am also wearing leg warmers and a sweatshirt. Why? Because baby, it's cold outside!

I will be the first to admit I hate being cold and I hate the winter. It's cold and windy out. Not to mention I happen to be cold inside, too. The sun goes into hiding (although that is a plus for my sleeping habits!) and motivation levels tend to drop.  Apparently my puppy is even feeling the winter's affects already. He has been sleeping more over the last few weeks. Not sure if he's sick or just feeling blah due to the gloomy weather.

Sleepy puppy!

And while I am not a fan of being cold, in the month of December I don't mind it AS MUCH. Why might you ask? Because it is my favorite time of year! Christmas is coming!!!

I love the holidays. I love spending time with my family and decorating and buying presents... and of course getting them, but the wrapping/giving/seeing facial reactions to said gifts are better. I love the Christmas lights and holiday music! Everything about this time of year is great!

The Christmas lights are so pretty at night!

And thanks to my new found love of Pinterest, I have been buying supplies to make some wonderful Christmas gifts this year. Now is as good of time as any to get crafty! I think my husband is freaking out about the money I'm spending, but he's super happy I've found a new hobby. I'll let you know how it all goes.

Until then, bundle up and stay warm, because baby, it's cold outside!

What It's Like to Have Support

For those of you out there who are struggling with life situations, make sure you have a great support system.

It doesn't matter if you are deciding to change college majors or buy a home. It can be something small or big or even huge, like struggling with health issues.

When you surround yourself with wonderful people, the big things don't always seem as big because you have people there sharing that burden with you. You can talk to them, cry with them, listen for advice or just have them there for a familiar face. The little things that those supportive people do for you during your struggle will mean more to you in the future than at the given second they are there. Why? Because you don't want to dwell on the miserable, but will always remember the struggles you went through to get to where you are today.

I can honestly say I have one great support system. Other people were better at it than others, but I will always remember the love, hugs, and support I received during my lowest times.

If you care to read about one of my stories, feel free here.


If you don't feel comfortable talking to friends or family about your current situation or crisis, check out your community's support groups. There are a ton out there and I will be the first to admit I've gone to many of these! I made great friends and know they can relate to exactly what I have gone through.

Just remember, you are never alone! All you have to do is talk. :-)

The Holiday Spirit

It's that time of year again!

The time of year when it's ok to shop to your heart's content.

The time of year when Christmas decorations are coming out of storage and placed in that "perfect" spot.

The time of year when you begin to bring out winter coats, mittens, scarves and hats.

The time of year when every weekend is booked until the New Year.

And to think.... this happens for most Americans. I am definitely one of them!

It started with the Thanksgiving holiday. Yummy food was consumed, Black Friday shopping was done, creativity kicked into full gear, and memories were made with family and friends. The sad part? I DIDN'T HAVE A CAMERA!

It was being repaired. And the other sad part? It came back on Saturday. Oh well. I have the memories, right? Still, candid shots of those memories would have been nice....

This past holiday weekend was exactly what the doctor ordered. Rest, relaxation, family and shopping. Oh, and a 10 year high school reunion with some of the best Ramblers out there!

While this post may not be a long one, or have pictures in it, I sure do hope you can see in this post that I was "healthy" enough to enjoy a Thanksgiving feast without fear.

Yes, I do believe the Remicade has kicked in and my body has thoroughly enjoyed 7 nights off of midnight working. We shall all see how long this lasts!

Do keep your fingers crossed. :-)


What was the best part of your Thanksgiving holiday??

It's the Little Things

I could be having the worst possible day. A day so bad that I don't want to change out of my pajamas, leave the house, answer my phone OR check Facebook. Yup, that bad.

And yet, something so small has the power to turn that frown upside down. Let me share a couple of things that have potential to cheer me up on a bad day.

 A ball of fur. Yup, fur. This little ball of fur will be brought up numerous times throughout my blogging career. He is cute and playful and I love him. He definitely helps cheer me up. Plus, he's the only free "person" during normal working hours.

"Smile," he says!

Really bad-for-you food. Even if this normally makes me feel like crap afterward. (How could I eat that?!? It's clogging my arteries!) However, during the consumption of said bad food, its taste is enough to cheer me up for a good 15 minutes. Then I need to take that ball of fur out for a few dozen long walks. Because a moment of this food on the lips, forever on my hips!

I splurged and hit up Dunkin Donuts on my way home from work. Coffee was home brewed. Mmm whip cream!

All free! Thank you Monopoly game piece instant winners! Yummmmmm.

A good conversation. One that has you laughing helps too, of course!

A good conversation. (Not a typo.) Especially when you have dinner with friends you haven't talked to in almost a decade and conversation flows like no time has passed. I miss hanging out with you and I am super glad life is treating you both well. Can't wait for the next one!

Snail mail. Do people even remember what this is?!? With emails and Facebook invites, I feel that the world is forgetting the excitement we all experienced getting letters in the mail as a child. Yes, it's quicker the internet way and stamps are getting more and more expensive. Personal letters are, and will always be, the best. I love getting the mail. Now, I do put it aside when I know it's bills, advertising, etc., but that one note in the mail, whether it's a thank you or birthday card, makes my day!

A clean house. Haha, it's not as clean as I want it majority of the time, but when it's clean, really clean, I am one happy girl!

Leg warmers. We have decided to try and not turn the heat up as high [as I like it] this winter. That means I'm going to be cold. I heart my new leg warmers and am excited to wear them. Especially since it's getting cooler outside. Brrrr!

Hiding under my jeans are stylish and warm leg warmers!

 Crock pots. Yes, I have 2 of them. There are some amazing recipes out there and I love the easy clean up! With my new found time, I have decided to cook more often and I think that makes a happy husband. Using the crock pot still allows me to cook, however I don't have to be home or stuck in the kitchen the entire time the food is making itself tasty. It's a win-win situation for me. Home-cooked meals and easy clean up? What's not to love about a Crock pot?

A good book. I am not the biggest reader, but I love a good book. My friend just invited me to join GoodReads and there are a lot of good books out there! I can't wait to become a bookworm. To live in another "world" for a couple of hours a day is not only a nice change, it's good for the brain. I'm also attempting to prevent dementia and Alzheimer's. Ask me in 40 years if it worked.

Pinterest. What is this you say? It's this amazing website that has everything from pictures of cute animals to recipes and craft ideas. It is awesome! Sometimes I have to pry myself away from this website to accomplish adult-like things like cleaning and cooking.

"No I haven't seen your lipstick"... found on Pinterest.

 An unexpected surprise. My husband doesn't like Valentine's day, so I don't expect flowers on February 14th. However, when he comes home from work on a random day with a bouquet in hand, that is the best surprise! I love things like that! Yes, I say I love surprises... however, as I tried to explain to my husband, that means I have no clue about said surprise. If it's my birthday week and I know you bought me something, I will bug you until you A) give it to me or B) tell me what it is. I can't help it! I don't like waiting!!! But when I really am not expecting something, I have the biggest smile ever and my heart gets all warm knowing I was thought of. For example, I came home from work Halloween morning to a Halloween card, a bag of my favorite candies, and a couple of random things we needed around the house that we continued to forget every week while shopping. So thoughtful and a total surprise. Definitely cheered me up after a long work night.

Pink lipstick. Yes, this cheers me up. I can't always pull off fun colors because of my complexion and hair color, but I love me some pink lips. Does it look that bad???

Pink lipstick is the best!

These little things can change my day. They are simple and inexpensive. Some are time consuming, others mindless activities. In the end, I don't care what they may be, I only care that they can cheer me up. I'd rather have wrinkles around my mouth and eyes from smiling too much than from frowning.

Fun fact: You burn more calories smiling than frowning. I'll gladly smile over the little things in life.

What are the little things that cheer you up??